Hi Francis, okay - so this is what I like: I like the non-human cast, but I don't think the antique shop or the parcel are really earning their keep in your story. This story could be taking place in any kind of environment really and the parcel is likewise a bit inert... I do have an idea that might make better use of these things without changing your story too much at all. It would make much more sense if your birds were 'stuffed birds' - (taxidermy in an antique shop makes perfect sense in a way that 'captured birds that happen to be in an antique shop' doesn't). So, you've got all these stuffed birds that, after the stroke of midnight or whatever, return to life and have this short window of time by which to make their escape. One of the stuffed birds - the owl - can still be the antagonist - because he doesn't want to escape; he's happy where he/she is. In terms of the 'ticking clock' factor (and the parcel too) it might be that the antique dealer is looking to get rid of all the dusty old birds to make room for something more profitable/sale-able - they're going to be packed into a parcel and sent off to the incinerators. The hero bird has come to understand this somehow, while the owl doesn't believe that the antique dealer would do such a thing. The actual nuts and bolts of their escape - how they get out - would still need to be identified, but in this scenario I'd argue your three prompts are all actually creating the story - as opposed to your story just 'happening' between them. What do you think?
Thanks Phil! I'm baffled with how you came up with such a good idea but hey, I love it. I think all of that is great and works really well, my biggest struggle however has been constructing the escape and making it worthy enough to be associated with escapology. I had the idea to reference Jonathan Goodwin, the Escapologist that performed the London Eye Burning Rope stunt. But then the question becomes how do I naturally put birds into that scenario. Somehow the hero finds himself in this situation? I'm not sure, any ideas?
OGR 26/01/18
ReplyDeleteHi Francis, okay - so this is what I like: I like the non-human cast, but I don't think the antique shop or the parcel are really earning their keep in your story. This story could be taking place in any kind of environment really and the parcel is likewise a bit inert... I do have an idea that might make better use of these things without changing your story too much at all. It would make much more sense if your birds were 'stuffed birds' - (taxidermy in an antique shop makes perfect sense in a way that 'captured birds that happen to be in an antique shop' doesn't). So, you've got all these stuffed birds that, after the stroke of midnight or whatever, return to life and have this short window of time by which to make their escape. One of the stuffed birds - the owl - can still be the antagonist - because he doesn't want to escape; he's happy where he/she is. In terms of the 'ticking clock' factor (and the parcel too) it might be that the antique dealer is looking to get rid of all the dusty old birds to make room for something more profitable/sale-able - they're going to be packed into a parcel and sent off to the incinerators. The hero bird has come to understand this somehow, while the owl doesn't believe that the antique dealer would do such a thing. The actual nuts and bolts of their escape - how they get out - would still need to be identified, but in this scenario I'd argue your three prompts are all actually creating the story - as opposed to your story just 'happening' between them. What do you think?
Thanks Phil! I'm baffled with how you came up with such a good idea but hey, I love it. I think all of that is great and works really well, my biggest struggle however has been constructing the escape and making it worthy enough to be associated with escapology. I had the idea to reference Jonathan Goodwin, the Escapologist that performed the London Eye Burning Rope stunt. But then the question becomes how do I naturally put birds into that scenario. Somehow the hero finds himself in this situation? I'm not sure, any ideas?
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